Me And The Ladrones
Over my 3 years here in the mountains of Nicaragua, one constant was my growing relationship with the neighborhood thieves.
The first time the thieves came
they took only a few things
from outside the house -
as if to say,
”We’re not too bad, just
temporarily borrowing these.”
I was fine with it but
my wife was livid.
What an affront!
That’s our stuff!
(a garden hose, some running shoes).
I wasn’t too bothered but
they kept coming back
cutting the fence and
disappearing up
the long, grass covered mountainside
at the back of our house.
They must need it,
I said to myself.
Inshallah.
The good lord giveth
and the good lord taketh away.
When they took my tools
and whippersnipper,
I did get a little angry
but it didn’t last long.
They were locked up and
it wasn’t too polite of them
to not obey the ground rules
I thought we’d established.
I did meet one of the thieves.
I was swinging in my hammock
and heard the cleaning lady
screaming “Ladrone, ladrone!”
at the top of her lungs.
So, I ran to the car and raced
to the top of the mountain,
the thief was sure to pop up there
after his climb through
the long grass.
And he did!
He almost bumped right into me.
I began the usual yelling and he just
slowly moved away,
one hand out front and
the other at his side where he wore
a long homemade knife.
I nodded in agreement.
The young, slender thief
nodded back and
we both went our ways.
After a while, I started
leaving the thieves
goodies outside to steal,
just to keep them happy.
Some cleaning products.
Some gloves. Some clothes.
I’d even leave the light on
so they wouldn’t trip and
hurt themselves.
Sometimes I goofed up.
I’d sit outside in the dark
drinking wine and writing poems
and drunk
stumble in the house
leaving the thieves
a poetry book or a nice leather chair
to scoop up
if they so desired.
I recently came back from a 2-week trip.
And yes, again the ladrones
had been busy,
all the more so because
nobody was in the house to bother them.
They took everything outside
that was not tied down -
even the special light bulbs
I had bought for extra security.
Now that I’m out of here,
I’m gonna miss the thieves.
They kind of made my life
more complete
even a little exciting
at times.
Damn.
I’ll have to learn again
how to love my enemies.
Reminds me of the American people and their government.