That Voice In Your Head

I'm not doing enough. I'm not doing enough. I'm not doing enough. I'm not doing enough. I'm not doing enough. I'm not doing enough. I'm not doing enough. I'm not doing enough.

The man down the road from my house.

[View the visual poem version on YouTube]

There is a guy who, for as long as I’ve been here, just sits outside his house. 7am he’s there. 2pm he’s there. 7pm he’s there. He sits there with his cigarette and waves to those who pass by. He pets dogs that come up to say hello. His daughter brings him a sandwich now and then. He’s always there. He’s wonderful. He’s happy. But most of the world does not understand him. Here’s why.

There is this little voice in our heads saying, “You are not doing enough.” Get that next degree. Increase the bank balance. Spend more time with your kids. Move to a better neighborhood, in a better house. Run quicker, get stronger. “You are not doing enough.”

The myth of progress does not just apply to the macro level. It is embedded in our culture, the personal beliefs which drive our actions every day. It is the belief that we are here on earth to work, to conquer, to tame it and make it our own. To get a lot, every damn thing. We are here on earth “to make it”, whatever that nonsense means. And to do so, we must get up each morning and keep busy, doing, getting, building, consuming, winning, achieving - doing enough.

It’s the protestant work ethic consumed by modern, western, consumer culture. You are here to win, to make money, to do more, to be bigger, better, stronger, higher, farther …

And I’m here to tell you - it’s all a den of lies. The lie of heaven, one day if you work hard, you’ll get there. The lie of “if I work hard, one day, I’ll be able to relax, enjoy.” So you finally get to that day and find out - your life has taught you who you are. You can’t relax, enjoy, your whole life had just been that thought, that earworm and you’ll never get it out of your head. It’s too late. “I’m not doing enough.”

I repeat. I’m here to tell you - it’s a den of lies.

I’m not saying all the self-help B.S. of just chill, drop out, find yourself yadda yadda … is of no import. No. I’m just saying don’t follow that little voice in your head. Redefine “enough” and that will be enough. Follow that logic.

Get that voice out of your head. Forgive yourself and then throw it away for good. There is nothing you truly have to achieve to be worthy, to be alive, to be “of life”.

I repeat. Get that voice out of your head. You are doing enough. You are here.

YOU ARE SPECIAL

Yes. – You!
You are special
and i don’t mean
because U R unique
one of a kind
‘nd all that B.S.
they feed you down at
the self-help section.

No.

You may have
brought down 387 Spitfires over Germany.
You may have
painted better than Picasso ever done.
You may have
been declared a saint
(and damn well know you ain’t).
You may have
been the first man on another moon.

…..

I don’t give a shit
nor does the universe
for
you are special
in, of, and, as (you name the preposition)
you are.

Don’t believe the buggers
that nail us to a wall
and describe how this one
is a work of art
the other not.

Don’t believe the number numers,
the rankers with their files
the check markers with their critic’s smiles.

You are special because
you are necessary.

Each photon of your enormity
says that
you are here and
this world wouldn’t exist
without you ….

You may be a rock star
or slinging beer at a bar.
You may be on stamps
or enjoy fast cars.

Doesn’t matter ….

Rich or poor
slow or sore.

You are special.

So relax and be.
There is nothing you
have to accomplish or believe
save,
you are special
a god that makes this world
go round,
special found
as you are, are
here ‘n now.